Post by crystal on Dec 22, 2007 20:47:49 GMT -5
So yeah, anyone who's known me for any length of time knows that I often enjoy dwelling on things, and that I can sometimes be a whiny complainer. *snort*
And sometimes I can be pretty thick. But I have found that sometimes, after a good rant, it clears out some of the mental and/or emotional clutter, so to speak, so that I can stop and look at the situation more rationally. And then I often think about how much of an idiot and/or jerk I must have sounded back while I was ranting, heh.
But anyway, the point I'm trying to get to is this. I've found that... I dunno, I guess it can be easy to deny something in yourself, or mistake something or something else. Human beings are complex creatures, and whatnot.
But anyway, have you ever had a moment where you just totally realized something about yourself that has practically been under your nose for years and years, but it just goes unrealized? Perhaps it's just too doggone obvious so it's easily overlooked, or it's just a case a denial. But whatever the case, yeah, I had a case like this yesterday, when I finally woke up and realized something about myself, with some help from my friends and my cousin.
Everyone who knows me knows that I enjoy to write, and I've been writing in one way or another for as long as I can remember. But I realized something about myself yesterday, as I've said. This may not make sense to most people, but it actually makes perfect sense to me in a way.
I've realized... I don't love to *write* exactly, even though I still do in a way. I know that probably sounds contradictory, but let me explain. Specifically, I love to type. I love the way words can flow smoothly from my fingertips and I can usually express my thoughts, my feelings, and possibly my heart and soul through words.
I've realized... this is why I sometimes go *groan* inwardly when I need to edit something I've written, or proof-read it, or even totally rewrite something. I just enjoy the feeling of being able to express something in silent, written language... it's not something that I can do when I speak.
So yeah... maybe this sounds weird. And I guess in a way, it's still the same thing as enjoying to write. But on the other hand... it also explains why I don't really have much interest or motivation, really, in attempting to write a novel series or something. I just... prefer doing this sort of thing.
And sometimes I can be pretty thick. But I have found that sometimes, after a good rant, it clears out some of the mental and/or emotional clutter, so to speak, so that I can stop and look at the situation more rationally. And then I often think about how much of an idiot and/or jerk I must have sounded back while I was ranting, heh.
But anyway, the point I'm trying to get to is this. I've found that... I dunno, I guess it can be easy to deny something in yourself, or mistake something or something else. Human beings are complex creatures, and whatnot.
But anyway, have you ever had a moment where you just totally realized something about yourself that has practically been under your nose for years and years, but it just goes unrealized? Perhaps it's just too doggone obvious so it's easily overlooked, or it's just a case a denial. But whatever the case, yeah, I had a case like this yesterday, when I finally woke up and realized something about myself, with some help from my friends and my cousin.
Everyone who knows me knows that I enjoy to write, and I've been writing in one way or another for as long as I can remember. But I realized something about myself yesterday, as I've said. This may not make sense to most people, but it actually makes perfect sense to me in a way.
I've realized... I don't love to *write* exactly, even though I still do in a way. I know that probably sounds contradictory, but let me explain. Specifically, I love to type. I love the way words can flow smoothly from my fingertips and I can usually express my thoughts, my feelings, and possibly my heart and soul through words.
I've realized... this is why I sometimes go *groan* inwardly when I need to edit something I've written, or proof-read it, or even totally rewrite something. I just enjoy the feeling of being able to express something in silent, written language... it's not something that I can do when I speak.
So yeah... maybe this sounds weird. And I guess in a way, it's still the same thing as enjoying to write. But on the other hand... it also explains why I don't really have much interest or motivation, really, in attempting to write a novel series or something. I just... prefer doing this sort of thing.